ZuluOne: Heal the Wounds You Didn't Know You Carried

05. How Business, Spirituality, and Healing Intersect | Calvin Correli

• ZuluOne • Episode 5

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Calvin Correli is a multi-faceted entrepreneur who serves as the founder and CEO of Simplero, an online company that simplifies tech for coaches and authors. He also commands influence as a speaker, author, investor, and spiritual business coach. With a knack for coding since the age of five, Correli possesses a unique ability to iterate systems and seeks continuous simplification in all his ventures.

Find more from Calvin:
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@CalvinCorreliOfficial
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/calvincorreli
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/truecalvin
Simplero: https://simplero.com
Website: https://calvincorreli.com/
Twitter (X): https://twitter.com/calvincorreli

Support the ZuluOne Podcast: https://www.buzzsprout.com/892585/support

Find more from us:
Website: https://www.zuluone.org/
Substack: https://johnacosta.substack.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/zuluonepodcast/?hl=en
X: https://x.com/jaykaboomboom

— Chapters —
00:00 - Opening the Conversation
02:05 - Calvin’s Discovery of Family Constellations
07:12 - The Unseen Code in Human Systems
10:45 - Entrepreneurship as a Spiritual Path
15:23 - Tracing Trauma Through Generations
19:48 - Breaking Free from Family Loyalties
24:11 - The Hidden Impact of Birth Order
28:35 - AI, Consciousness, and the Future of Healing
33:02 - Elon Musk, Genius, and Unresolved Trauma
37:19 - The Cost of Suppressing Pain in Leadership
42:56 - Healing the Entrepreneurial Mindset
48:10 - Systemic Patterns in Business and Society
53:42 - The Role of Government in Collective Trauma
58:05 - What It Means to Be All In on Life
01:03:27 - Closing Reflections and Next Steps

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Speaker 1:

Today on the Zulu One podcast, I'm joined by Calvin Corelli as we dive into family constellations, the unseen systems guiding our lives, the future of AI and the need for healing, even for figures like Elon Musk. Together, we reflect on his work, his book and the deeper connections between technology, humanity and the state of our world. Let's get started, calvin John.

Speaker 2:

How are you, sir Phenomenal?

Speaker 1:

I feel like I'm talking to a kindred spirit. You know, I kind of was doing a little background on you and saw this concept of spiritual entrepreneurship and I was just you know very much resonated with me. I know that you're the CEO of a company, you've been doing this for a long time, you're familiar with Family Constellations, and so tell me a little bit about how you came across this work and how has it changed things over the last years.

Speaker 2:

So Family Constellations is quite new to me. It's only about a month ago that I discovered Family Constellations and it's crazy to me. It's only about a month ago that I discovered Family Constellations and it's crazy to me. I've been. I had my first spiritual teacher that I worked with in 2007. I've done a lot of work and somehow I've never come across Family Constellations before and it blew my mind. I was with, uh, with Tony Robbins and his group in Abu Dhabi last month and Michelle Blechner was there, um, doing some workshops on this and it just it blew my mind away. And so since then, since coming home, I've read I'm on book number six reading about family constellations. I've had several sessions and I'm just, it just blows my mind, cause it's, it's like there's. I've been doing all of this work kind of on myself, not recognizing that a bunch of this wasn't mine at all. It's my, is my. My mom had a stillborn son before my older brother and, like a lot of it, is his or other people in the family. So, yeah, it's been remarkable.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that's, you know, I saw, I saw your book, you know, and I saw your book and I saw Michelle holding your book and I'm like, oh man, that would be, it would be really great to connect with with Calvin Michelle. I love her dealer, she's a she's a dear, dear friend and you know, I'm just impressed by the levels that she's been able to amplify this message of family consolations. And you know what? What happens? A lot is like people are intuitively connected to the system, right, people that have been working on themselves and it sounds like you started with that a long time ago. What was the first kind of iteration of getting into, you know, dealing with your crap efforts.

Speaker 2:

The technical term dealing with your crap.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, the technical working on your shit is the technical, technical term, right, but I think so um, I think so it started.

Speaker 2:

2003 was a really great year and a really sucky year for me, but it was like it was. I I I'm from denmark. Uh, my girlfriend and I had moved to new york in 99 and then moved back to denmark about a year before 2002 and I'd started my first company as an adult and it was going fantastic. I won this startup of the year award and I did a conference where people came to Copenhagen from MIT in Boston and big institutions Greenpeace, international, heidelberg University in Germany, all these places and, and I got married and I was like flat riding this high and and I won this award of startup of the year and I was like crushing it.

Speaker 2:

Then I invited some friends and and uh and smart people to an advisory board meeting. I just had them sounds fancy, you just had them come over to my house. We sat for three hours and and get, and they advised me on my business. And then, as we were wrapping up, one of them Thomas looked me straight in the eyes and he said look, brother, we've been here for three hours.

Speaker 2:

I still have no idea what you want. And he was like what do you mean? What I want? I just want to build a big business and be something right, like wait, that's it, what's one more could there be? And then I was like wait, are you allowed to like want, want something in business? Is that a thing?

Speaker 2:

I didn't know, and then it was like I have no clue what the hell I want. I just knew that I needed to reach a certain level of success in order to be not okay, in order to be not worthless as a human being, and it really sparked this whole journey of like I don't know what I want. How does one know what they want? I can't feel myself. How would I know what I want if I can't feel anything? And so get, got you know, a therapist, a psychotherapist, um, for a little bit, and discovered various like forms of body therapy and other kinds of therapies. And then, um, 2007 so four years later was when I I got a spiritual teacher and started to take a coach education and become a coach myself, realizing, oh, I might actually have some skills in this department which was very foreign to me, like I remember. I remember when my one of my coaches was like you should become a coach. I didn't think you'd be a great coach.

Speaker 1:

I'm like what are you?

Speaker 2:

talking about, and I'm not a people person, I'm a computer person, and and yeah, then it's just been been on and on from there.

Speaker 1:

So I know that you were. You know you come from the coder background. How have seen that. You know, through through this healing work, that you start seeing the code in the, in people and systems and um in different dynamics yes, I, it's a.

Speaker 2:

It's a great question. I do actually. So coding software is all about language, yeah, syntax, and then when there's, if you wanted to do a certain thing, you have to do it the right things in the right order. Or if there's a bug, if there's a problem, you have to identify what exactly the thing is. And that there's a lot of um. There's a lot of both art and science to that. There's a lot of creativity to that.

Speaker 2:

One of my first career path was actually I wanted to be a jazz pianist and then when I decided to drop that, yeah, there's this huge, huge connection there, right, math and logic, music, you know, software, all of it. So when I dropped that, everybody was like, oh my God, calvin's like such a shame. You're so creative, like you know, why do you want to do software instead of music? I'm like software is every bit as creative as music. It really is so, so, and our minds are also coded with language. Everything, at the end of the day, comes down to language, which is made out of words which are made out of sounds, which is made out of words which are made out of sounds, which are made out of vibrations, like it's all the same shit, right yeah?

Speaker 2:

yeah we're gg13 here. It's all the same shit, and so I I. One of the monikers I use for myself is a mind debugger, so I'll listen to what people say and their language, using that same lens of like. Oh, that word that you used right there is pointing to the trap that you've made for yourself.

Speaker 1:

Oh geez, and how many times incredible people that we come across are are masters of crafting the best traps for themselves. Right, oh, yes. You know, we've got, you know we've called yeah right, it's like we all, we all come across these incredible people that are very good at what they do and then they're just self-sabotaging out of loyalties to their family system or whatever that looks like I've just finished, like a few weeks ago, finished reading, listening to the biography of elon musk yeah, the big one by walter isaacson.

Speaker 2:

Have you read that?

Speaker 1:

so I I'm not sure if the same one, it's the. I read the first one that they did, the one that they talk about his, uh, great-grandfather, his grandfather flying the first solo from south africa to australia with his wife and I'm like it's continue. I want to hear your your take on this. This is interesting.

Speaker 2:

I mean he's basically disowned his father at this point and has this whole thing with his father where, like, where he's, he's, you know all the stories of his father like berating him as a kid and all that stuff.

Speaker 2:

Right, I'm just like, come, come on, elon, let's do some family, yeah when you're talking about someone who's really, really smart and then so freaking, tormented right, yeah, I think it's something that a lot of people who are very driven whether it's artists or or entrepreneurs, or scientists, whatever they have this like innate drive from from pain right from, and they're they're so afraid that if I heal that pain, will I still have the drive to produce. Like, will I lose my edge? So, like, better not look at that shit. And I get it because, like you might lose your drive right or you might get another, a whole other gear. Now you get to create from love instead of from from fear, from you're going, you're, you're, you're sharing your creative generosity versus you're trying to, like, fix something that you think is broken yeah, and the and the um.

Speaker 1:

You know that driving force can go, or you know like can go sideways very quickly, right? If that's the same person that has that drive towards, because their trauma circumstances or their trauma code points towards something that's constructive and innovation, the same thing can point towards destruction, and that you have this profound force of destroying yourself or destroying everything in your path, that it's based on the same kind of mechanism to point, just point it at the wrong place, right?

Speaker 2:

Yes, yeah, and you see that with Elon, yeah, he burns people out and, and you know, he creates all kinds of problems for himself that he then needs to go fix. You know, yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

It works out, but you know you don't have to do that.

Speaker 1:

And it's ineffective, and it's, it's ineffective, right. And who am I to say that the guy that's worth I don't know $300 billion is on the wrong track. I mean, yeah, the proof is in the pudding, but so many people try to emulate that thing and fail throughout the process because they don't have the secret ingredient of being able to do it. It's, in some capacity, unsustainable and extraordinarily inefficient If somebody that's so efficiency-driven I don't like the word efficiency, I like the word effective. It's like one shot, one kill, being as effective as possible. The way to become as effective as possible is through dealing with your trauma and becoming that flow state where you can create an incredible life but also a credible abundance in all intertwined and going towards the purpose of making the, the the world, a better place, right.

Speaker 2:

And again, at the end of the day, why are we doing all this? Yeah, exactly, we're doing it because we want to feel good, we want to feel something.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, tell me a little bit about someplera and how your spiritual journey has influenced working as a CEO. Hi, I'm John from the Zulu One Podcast. If you like what you're hearing and it resonates with you, please consider becoming a monthly supporter. The link is below.

Speaker 2:

Thanks, so the Simplera started because in 2008, I finally had a moment where I answered the question of what is it that I really want to do here? What is it I want for my life? And the answer that came to me was integrating spirituality and entrepreneurship, and that's been my North Star since 2008. And then, okay, great, how do I do that? What does that look like? Well, part of it is is me working with clients you know with as a coach on doing that. And then, as I got into that, I was like, okay, how do I get started with that? And online marketing.

Speaker 2:

So I discovered online marketing and online courses and that whole world, and then I needed software for myself, for my own business, and so I started building Simplero and um, and then that grew over time and so here we are, 15 years later and the software is still around the coach. I'm still doing the coaching and loving it. I actually stopped doing coaching for many years and and got back into it a few years ago and I love doing both and using my own software to run my my own own business. And so, yeah, simplera is really that software that does everything that you need for your coaching or course or kind of creator business like from from websites and funnels and charging people money and delivering content to them and making sure people have access to what they need to have access and transcribing your videos and AI bots with like all of the things, yeah, in one place.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, you know, one of the things that one of the phenomenons that happens in the family consolation world is that you know they're they're terrible marketers Right. They have this incredible gift of being able to connect to the systemic field and you know this knowing field and they're just terrible at you know, branding and marketing and doing kind of like the day to day minutia, kind of things, right. So it's very rare to see somebody that has the combination of the spirituality with the entrepreneurship, the structure, to be able to do that. So when I, when I when I started researching you, I was like, oh, this guy totally gets it. Like, oh, this guy totally gets it. And you know, I wanted to.

Speaker 1:

One of the reasons why I wanted to have that conversation is to say, you know, it's like it's. We need more entrepreneurs that are spiritually guided right, that have the ability to tap into that side of us, because it's a huge part of the equation that we're not considering. Is that human potential aspect that we're not, that we're not considering? Is that human potential aspect, how do you integrate? How do you integrate kind of the leadership into the spirituality, into the personal, when so many people try to keep that separate? How do you navigate that, that space?

Speaker 2:

I love what you said about the more spiritual entrepreneurs, because that was one of the insights as well. I can coach only so many people people but if I can create the platform and make the make the ecosystem that allows other people to do that work, we can reach many more people that way, and so that's part of the mission of, as well as just support the all the teachers out there who are doing amazing work so they can reach more clients more effectively. They can share that gift that they have without burning out from all the minutiae of it or from just poor business models or business strategies. So it's not we don't. We do more than just the software we also like as a member of you get at. You get coaching and training on how to be a better coach and build your business better, and all of that stuff as well.

Speaker 1:

Oh, wow Jeez.

Speaker 1:

I mean, yeah, that's a, that, that's a powerful tool for you know, especially for this community, to be able to do that as this. It's like if you're giving somebody the platform to do it, you know it's, it becomes, it amplifies that voice because you know, you see, these facilitators that you know, michelle, is a very rare case that she, the majority of the facilitators I had known over, you know, over all these years is that they're just like doing these small workshops in communities and doing, and that's kind of the thing, right, they're not getting the exposure that Michelle has gotten, which is incredible, that Tony and Sage have gotten. You know, I've put this together and showing it to people like you, you know, yeah, yeah, I'm so grateful that they did that.

Speaker 2:

Yes, yeah. And yeah, I was talking to her about it. She was like how did you, how did you, how did you get on Tony's stage? And she's like I have no idea, it just kind of happened.

Speaker 1:

So that that story is incredible. That story it's just like it just was happenstance and it was. You know when. When, what they say about luck, you know when, when preparation meets opportunity, it's like it just kind of clicked and and it was supposed to happen to answer your question about leadership and spirituality.

Speaker 2:

Um, for me, I don't. I don't ever make anyone believe what I believe right and and everybody has their own spirituality, some people, people's spiritualities. There is no spirituality. One of my, one of my sayings is spirituality, done right is just reality. Over time, as that shifts and we open the lens, we're going to see that science proves everything that you know, we know to be true spiritually and the things that that, that like the things that are kind of hokey, like there's, like there's definitely in this world realm of spirituality. There's stuff that's hokey, that's make-believe, that's fantasy, and I think that's going to fall away so that we can get to the things that are real. Um, but right now we're just ignoring that from a scientific viewpoint, generally speaking, and I think that's that's bound to change in the next I don't know decade or two or something like time is is ripe for that change to happen that's.

Speaker 1:

That's a. That's a super interesting point. I'm curious to find out what your thoughts are. What's going to happen with this advent of AI and spirituality? What's, how do you think those two worlds are going to converge?

Speaker 2:

I don't know. It's very interesting, um cause it's like well, I mean, you know what? What is spirituality? One of the one of the things, one of the books that inspired me so much, like 15 years ago. It's a book called extraordinary knowing okay and um highly recommend it.

Speaker 2:

Essentially, the story is use of. She is a stanford phd psychologist. She has this experience where she loses an object uh, it's a harp but her daughter plays a harp. She loses the object. This random not random, but this guy who lives several thousand miles away, pre-internet, he, he gets a map of where she lives and he's like the, the harp is in this house and it turns out it was. And he's like how, what? How do you know? Like that's, you's impossible given our traditional scientific understanding. And so she dedicated the rest of her life to studying this, created a group of 60 other scientists, well-renowned people, to study paranormal phenomena and try to get at a science of those phenomena. And one of the things, one of the conclusions that I drew from it is that everything exists on a continuum, from 100% certainty to 100% uncertainty. And there's this continuum that we can live within.

Speaker 2:

And the moment we insist on 100% certainty, certainty, we collapse the field of potentiality and we live in a fixed dead 3d world, yeah, and so if you apply science in a way that it has to be certain, then you exclude everything. That's not that which is the vast majority of life, yeah, and so we have to address it like the spiritual world, which is also what we get access to through our subconscious mind, operates in probabilities, and so we have to operate at that realm to be open to those things. So I think that's that's the direction that I see. Would you know, see science eventually moving in, because it's just inevitable that it has to. And yeah, and I think that's that's how we start to link things now in. In terms of the question of ai, it's interesting because because I I'm reading a book right now thomas campbell called my big toe. I don't know if you've come across that no, I haven't I haven't, oh, as in theory of everything, but also okay

Speaker 2:

um, and I'm only a third of the way through. But essentially the argument he's making is like what, if we live inside, like it's essentially like we live inside of an illusion and like you, imagine this, the field, field of consciousness, being an amorphous to our for our intents and purposes, infinite field. But it doesn't have to actually be infinite. But now you introduce a clock of some sort that just has a cycle and it clicks, and then the elements within this can change state, and then the elements within this can change state and essentially, like now you have, like that's like I said, I'm a third way in, so I'm not sure this is going to play out exactly, but what I'm starting to get is like he's essentially describing how computers work there's a clock and it's binary and all of that, and so now, like AI can model all of that.

Speaker 2:

So the question is is that conscious? I would, I would. My inclination would be to say well, there is something it's called a soul, so something that's, you know, life itself, that these machines can never have. They tend to replicate more of the rational mind, not the full being that we are. We're so much more than the rational mind If the rational mind is like one tiny speck. All of this is who we are and we pretend like we're tiny, we're that little speck, and then we compare ourselves against an AI who's much better at that stuff than we are in some respects, and we're like, oh my god, can humans or nothing.

Speaker 1:

I think it's a very limited view of humanity yeah, that's um, you know, I've I've had, um, I'm in technology, right, I run a technology company, right, cyber security technology company and and I see that there's so many similarities between technology as a manifestation of that subconscious in some way, right, right, it's like cloud computing is almost, you know, the relationship of the workstation and the soul, right, and the cloud is the workstation soul.

Speaker 1:

In some capacity you can push that experience to all of them at the same time.

Speaker 1:

And you know there was Lex Friedman was talking about how these extraordinarily complex systems come out of these very simple rules, right, and that, and that in some way, you know we are these large systems and I think constellations taps into those, that systemic intelligence and in a very repeatable, measurable, you know, trainable way that you can say, out of this, out of this ether or whatever morphogenetic resonance, you know trainable way that you can say, out of this, out of this ether or whatever morphogenetic resonance, um, you know what, uh, david bohm call.

Speaker 1:

You know, like david bohm's theories of patterns and waves, like there's it's, we're starting to approach where I think the, the, you know ai, in some capacity, will start seeing the forest for the trees. They'll start taking away the stuff that doesn't make sense and there's going to be like this is all true because it repeats in every single pattern, right that there's like an uh, you know we're starting to get into the objective truth and what I think is like it's true because it happens often, it happens all the time, that that the the fact itself, that it's observable is because it's why it's true, and I see that in, like the avon of ai, in some capacity, is going to start seeing where everything you know, the venn diagram covers over everything and where the truth lies because it it presents itself in every single system okay, I'm not sure I'm fully following here.

Speaker 2:

What is it that presents itself in every single system?

Speaker 1:

so, um, you know, when you start seeing, you know there's these, when you start seeing these profound truths that they represent and they follow these patterns, right. So there's patterns that happen in family systems, right, like the excluded one gets the. You know, if somebody is excluded, all the energy in the system goes to the excluded one. Like that's a pattern because it happens in every single system. So it talks about there's almost an intrinsic math or physics to these probabilistic theories that happen in systems and my thought is that these same things happen in every system. And so when large data models powered by AI will be like, this happens in this probabilistic, in this probabilistic fashion, over and over and, over and over again. So it means intrinsically, it's true. Does that make sense what I'm saying?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, it's, it's, yeah, I guess. So it happens over and over again and therefore it's true I'm thinking about. That reminds me of what rupert sheldrake talks about, with like habits of nature versus laws of nature. Is that a habit is a law? We don't really know, but we see it happening again and again.

Speaker 1:

right, yeah, exactly and and they like solidify and I'm a huge fan of sheldrake. I'm you know I know in in the scientific community. He's a bit of a of a, you know, flying outside of the bounds, but you know I think that there's some.

Speaker 1:

He's shaking the paradigm, right, he's shaking the paradigm, exactly, exactly. I'm just, I'm, I'm I've had had the privilege of of interviewing his wife and I'm just like, I'm such a fan of this morphogenetic resonance of these, these fields that you know, bert Hellinger and Rupert sheldrake were friends because, um yeah, they were friends because morphogenetic fields explain the phenomenon that happens in the family constellations yeah, yeah, that's the crazy thing, right.

Speaker 2:

So, so when you, when you tap in to these and, whether in person or over zoom, you tap into some, some family members, some energy, and like all of a sudden, like I'm just bawling my eyes out, I'm crying my eyes out and it's like what is that and can? Will ai ever do that? Will ai have like birth trauma?

Speaker 1:

I don't know. That's a that's a great question, but I think we're finding out what the that there is like the lack of evidence will be the evidence in some capacity, that the fact that ai cannot connect to the morphogenetic field is the fact that you're like, oh well, we'll never become sentient, because it will just be an amplification of our unless it it, you know, creates a like parasitic relationship where we are, its connection to the morphogenetic field. Does that make sense?

Speaker 2:

yeah, or maybe like literally, some people are like harari, you, you. Well, harari, I forgot his name. Harari, you know what I'm talking about.

Speaker 1:

Like, uh, johan harari?

Speaker 2:

yeah, I think is that his name I'm not sure I think one of those guys that are that are like oh, it's all just an algorithm, like I'm an algorithm, my dog's an algorithm, it's all just algorithms. I'm like we're like, no, like soul, heart, there's something more right um which, which. But he, he might be right that when ai gets sophisticated enough, like that's indistinguishable, for so I don't know, we'll find.

Speaker 1:

I don't think so, but yeah we don't know, that's going to be a good, a great, I mean. That is the question, right. It's like where does consciousness come from? And I think we're inching closer and closer with these, um phenomenological processes, to be like, hey, man, there's something that happens when you tap into this field where people it's, it's time is not a factor, um, distance is not a factor, it's there, there's some non-locality properties to it, because you can be on a zoom and a constellation and somebody can be in Australia having an immediate reaction to the words that are being said, when you know there's, there's, there's vast distances between the people and you could never you've never met this person and they're saying something that your grandmother would have said and it's a perfect representation of the trauma dynamics in your family system.

Speaker 1:

It's like I don't know, man, but this, there's something here that is extraordinarily spooky, right, yeah, I love that you have this, you know, kind of engineering mind, and you're looking at this from kind of a very similar perspective, that where I'm at Right. It's like I was a aircraft mechanic in the military. So I was like you know, I'm very systems oriented. I'm like, ok, trying to understand systems, and then I fell into this work and I'm like, oh, there's, there's some, there's some probabilistic, maybe physics in this thing where you can start seeing like, okay, so if we can figure this out, you can figure out like unresolved trauma loads and systems and in cultures and in a family. It's like, do you have a unresolved trauma index of a 10 versus a two and what does that look like for the success of the organization or the success of the family that's not held back by these patterns that keep them in a in a ineffective loop?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, exactly. And that to me, like the, the leadership and spirituality, I think the core of it is what some people call the law of the lid. For me is simply like the more that I like I become the lid on my organization as the leader, yes, yeah, and the more that I evolve myself and I clear these energetic entanglements or whatever it is that I do, the more I'm going to be effective as a leader and then, like the, the team is going to very quickly resonate with that Like. Like, my shifts are going to instantly cause some shifts on an an energetic level in the organization. Some people might, might, you know select themselves out. Other people are going to be drawn more in right, there's definitely the whole systemic piece of the organization as well that you can work with.

Speaker 2:

Even without that, just you as a leader doing that work like makes a huge difference I had when I realized, um, one of the things I discovered fairly early on, like 15, 16 years ago, was that I was born strangled in my own umbilical cord. So, starting with a near-death experience and then put in an incubator for two weeks, which is a break in bond with mom, yeah, um, and I just learned, actually it's crazy. On the trip to to uh, abu dhabi, where I was to meet michelle, I called my mom and then she said remember, a while back you asked me whether I wanted you no.

Speaker 2:

And I was like actually I don't remember that, but tell me more. And she's like yeah, I wasn't telling you the truth. The truth is that I didn't want you. I felt like you're coming too close to your brother. Your brother was just nine months old and I just found out I was pregnant again and it was too close, and so I was thinking about having an abortion. But then I talked to my sister and she said no, you're crazy. You don't know if you'll be able to get pregnant again. You got to have this baby and she did and she's obviously happy that she did and I'm happy that I did. And it wasn't like but that's, it wasn't like a big deal. In that way there's, there's that imprint in me that came to me in like at some point I was like, huh, why do I have that, you know? And before that, well, and then it's funny that she didn't want me. And then they come out practically dead.

Speaker 2:

It's like, yeah, all right, got the message, mom, you know, oh yeah, yeah and then, 15 years before that, I was at a, at a workshop where they did this anger release exercise which was freaking, phenomenal. I loved it. It's like rylas up for 10 minutes dynamic breathing stuff, and then like all right, unleash and then I just all this stuff came out of me that I like this whole new voice that I didn't know that I had. It was so powerful, so profound. And then, after the whole thing kind of settled down, I got this vision in front of my eyes of a birth scene and everybody was panicking and something was wrong. And so I asked my mom what happened at my birth, and that's when she told me I was strangled in my umbilical cord and I was like, oh crap, that makes sense.

Speaker 1:

What incredible insight. Yeah, yeah, what incredible insight.

Speaker 2:

And then I worked with a former Navy SEAL who turned coach, organization, whatever, but one of his core things was identifying your core trauma. There's like one trauma that precedes all the others and that kind of shapes the way that your brain looks at the world, cause it's like great, I did something, it worked, we survived. Now let's look out for other similar situations. So like I can apply that same strategy and you know it works because you're still alive, but it might not be that helpful anymore. And so for me what he identified was that core trauma. Now, the funny thing is that he had the same trauma himself. He had the same birth trauma, and so what he told me was that he made, he realized that it's a near-death experience, and so you start life, and I had to have no memory of this.

Speaker 2:

But you start life with you know the tunnel and the light and the other side, and do you want to go there. And then you're like I don't know. I was like do you go back in here? It's like wet and cold and damn, or do I stay there? And and so it tends to create the split inside where you're kind of half there, half not there, and I was like once he said that I was like holy shit, that's my entire life, you know, in relationships uh, leaving my family, my ex-wife and my kids, uh. And we talked about business as an entrepreneur, as a ceo, I was constantly looking can I hire someone else to be the ceo? Can I hire a ceo or a president or something like like I don't know if I want to be there, like I was always half in, half out, and so having that awareness oh, that's what I doing just allowed me to make that decision. Be like no, I'm going to be all in here.

Speaker 1:

Oh, wow, I mean, talk about, you know, one, one pattern manifesting in all aspects of life, like just what a gift to be able to to deal with that and, you know, to be able to identify that core trauma. And that's that's the thing that holds. It holds us back from potential Right, that becoming the best version of ourselves, to fully stepping into our power.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah. And seeing that there's nothing like everything happened perfectly, and now having the awareness of what, what it was, what those patterns were, I get to have choice in what I do with it and how I lead my life. I don't need to be trapped in that anymore. And it grew, it made me the person that I am today. I wouldn't be the person I am had I not had all these experiences. Wow.

Speaker 1:

Jeez. So what made you want to, you know, kind of amplify this, Because this could be something that you could easily keep to yourself and be like, hey, I don't want to. You know, this is kind of my process and be very private about it. What's what in your life kind of said, hey, I'm going to amplify this voice to say I want, I need to do this, to talk about this as many people as possible. Hi, I'm John Zulu. One is more than just a podcast. It's a mission to bring healing to families and communities. By becoming a supporter on Buzzsprout, you make this mission possible. Click the link in the description and join us, and thank you so much for being here.

Speaker 2:

When I realized that my life is about integrating spirituality and entrepreneurship. A great a big part of that is to be that role model, do that myself and share my journey, my experience, and so I'm sharing. I've shared everything that I've done. I'm sharing generously of everything I've done on my journey to get to where I am and I'll continue to do that. And so when I discovered Family Constellations and, like I said, it just blew my mind and I'm like obsessed with it now I'm like hell, yeah, Like I want I would love for everybody to know about this because it's such a powerful tool. I would love for everybody to know about this because it's such a powerful tool.

Speaker 2:

It's like I've spent ages working on like I've one of my core patterns have been feeling worthless, feeling like I. I'm so worthless that I shouldn't even take up space, because that is me taking space from other people. I'm so worthless, I shouldn't be breathing the air because I'm breathing other people's air and I need to like. Initially, I was like I need to be a Bill Gates, steve Jobs level, multi billionaire success by 30. Or I should just go kill myself and not exist. Like that was the programming. I'm like where the hell does that come from? And so I've done a lot of work on that over the years.

Speaker 2:

But then with Family Constellations, I'm like what if it's not freaking mine? What if it's just because my older brother was dead and I was like, oh, because you died I shouldn't live, you know, and and like as I've been connecting with him and taking him in, I get so emotional. I'm like I'm so grateful that I have that older brother, even if he's not alive. You know, like when I think about the older brother that I do have that's alive, like the way that I know he loves me so deeply, he always has my back. When I was in school and was bullied and it was unsafe for me to go anywhere because I would get beat up, and like I knew that if he was there, if I called on him, he would always have my back. And it's such a profound love that you can have with your siblings and just knowing that there's another soul there. Even if he's not in a physical body, he's still my brother, he's still my sibling.

Speaker 1:

So powerful. So in the birth order, have you done the work of where you are in the birth order as well, or in the pregnancy order?

Speaker 2:

So maybe you tell me so I have an older sister from my father's first marriage.

Speaker 1:

Okay.

Speaker 2:

She's number one, yeah. Older sister from my father's first marriage Okay, she's number one, yeah. And then the stillborn would be number two and my brother would be number three and I'm number four.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that's just being in your falling into your position in the family and knowing where you are in that order is just like it's such a, it's so tender and such a beautiful part of because we have the stories like oh, I'm the first one, or I'm the second one, or I'm the third one or whatever that is, and we carry those things out of loyalty to the ones that didn't make it right, that didn't weren't born, that weren't able to, and they and just honoring their position in the family is just such a like a tender thing to be able to process and it's such, so empowering, you know.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, I'm going to see my parents. My dad's 89th birthday is coming up next month. I'm going to go there to see him over in Denmark, and the day after I'm going to sit down with my parents and interview them on camera, with just getting all the stories of the family that they have. So I have that documented for me and for my kids. You know, just know, what are what? What actually did happen? You don't need to know right, but it's it helps to know.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it does. It does it fills in the blanks of a lot, of, a lot of stories, especially for for kids. You know to, to be able to, to, to do that and then create the context of what that is. So tell me, tell me a little bit of how. How many kids do you have and how has this affected you know, your relationship with your kids.

Speaker 2:

I have two kids, um, a boy that's 17 and a daughter that's 19. And, um, well, it's affected me profoundly. So we are I'm divorced from their mother. She lives in Denmark, and they live in Denmark with their mom. I live in New York city, and so we've and they were three and six when we split, when we broke up, and so I haven't been living with them that whole time, and the and the, the relationship with their, with their mother, has been fraught, has been fraught, and, and so I haven't seen them since April. We're now in November, so we're not.

Speaker 2:

There's some communication, but very little, and so, but what happened with Family Constellations? For me was it? It took it into my heart in a whole other way than anything else. So, specifically with Michelle, she did this, this breakout session where some other guy was up on stage talking he was the client, as they call it, yeah and he was talking about his older half brother, who he wanted to have a relationship with. But his brother had this resentment towards him because he felt like he had taken his dad away from him.

Speaker 2:

And so I volunteer to come up there and represent someone. I'm thinking I'm going to be representing the dad, but instead I end up representing the brother. As I was standing there, all of a sudden I was. I was. I started crying, crying and I got so touched and I realized this is how my son feels. It's not that I have another child, but his someone, something took his, whether it's his, my wife or his or the country or whatever it was, but something took his father away from him and he feels betrayed and let down and I was like I get it, son.

Speaker 2:

I'm so sorry, it breaks my heart. It breaks my heart, and the same with my daughter, of course. But this was like this was. I was specifically playing the brother, so I was really connecting with my son there and I was just like oh god, and where, a couple months ago we had a thing where he said he said you're not my dad. And it was the first time he'd said that. I was like what the fuck are you talking about? Like it really shocked me and I wasn't.

Speaker 2:

I'm not proud of her how I responded, but I was like I started arguing with him, like I'm like I'm your fucking dad and like anyone who tells you otherwise is is, you know, not right and all of that which is, I know, is not helpful. But I got emotional. I get how I get you know, I feel you. You know, I feel you in a whole other way. And then when I think about my ex-wife, I know her story, I know her family story and it breaks my heart, the pain that she's been through over breaking it, over the breakup. I was the one that left and it was her biggest fear and I get it and I, and for me, my father, you know, I said I, I have a half sister, my father divorced, my brother divorced, you know. So both my brother and I have been very loyal to our dads or our dad, and just seeing it's so humbling to see how this plays out, and it's not personal.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it's just personal.

Speaker 2:

It's just these patterns. We're energetic. These energies were stuck in until we change it yeah.

Speaker 1:

And what a gift, now that you know you have the tools to do it differently. Right that now you can say like, oh yeah, now we can create this, now through work, and you know it's, it's, it's obvious that you're extraordinarily committed to this healing and self-growth. It's like now you have this power and the language to be able to reconcile and break those patterns right For them. Right that they can say I no longer have to be loyal to my dad and my grandfather and that generational trauma and I can step into life fully without carrying the burdens that, that that came from our legacy yeah you know, and that's as parents, that's the kind of, that's the main goal.

Speaker 1:

Right is to say, hey, you know you can, you can make your decisions and screw up your life however you want to do it, but it won't be my stuff, right? Yeah?

Speaker 2:

and for the exercise, too, of of picturing, you know, as we did in the meditation beginning, my father behind me and my mother, all my ancestors, and that like imagining a string connecting my heart to their hearts and then to my children's hearts, and just knowing that that string of love is intact no matter what, no matter what happens. That love is there, it's always available to me from my ancestors, it's always available to them, to my children, from me and from their mother. Recognizing the love that both of us feel for our kids and seeing what amazing things like. Focusing also with my ex-wife, on the amazing love that we had together and all the beautiful experiences that we shared and the the pain that things didn't work out that we'd both the way we'd both wish that they would and that was how that was. And but we can still cherish and love everything that we had and the kids that we made were beautiful, amazing children, you know it's just the whole.

Speaker 2:

Inside of me, everything shifted from this and on the outside world, I'm, I'm. I know in my heart that that kind of shift won't happen inside of me without it impacting them. The kind of the quote, unquote evidence is not there in the 3d world at this point, but it, uh, it will happen, and if it don't, it's, it's all fine, you know.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it's, you know, they. They say in the consolation world is that movements happen between six months and up to two years after a consolation happens. Right, it's like and, and what ends up happening is like there's this dissolution of old patterns, like it. Just they just stop being there. Right, like you know, in the, in the, in the tech world, you don't know if you really fix something. It's the absence of the problem that makes you, you know, find out that you actually fix it right, like well, that worked right. You know, you know, find out that you actually fixed it Right, like well, that worked right. You know you did something and you made it. You made like four to five changes and one of the things was the thing that actually fixed it.

Speaker 1:

So, you know this, this family constellation work is a lot like that that you're like, oh okay, so something I did there, the problem's not happening anymore. So we obviously fixed it in one way. You know, and and and just, it's just such a such an incredible gift, and it's such an incredible gift that you can give your kids is to work on your own shit. Right, it's like, the more you work on your shit, the bigger the gift is for your children, yeah, yeah. So tell me a little bit about the book. You know, I, um, I'm I'm just very intrigued about about the book, that, that that you wrote, it's like I love the division of. You know, yeah, we can do this. I'm very intrigued about this book.

Speaker 2:

Yeah Well, so it's about politics, mainly US, but also it applies to most of the Western world and it's like it's applying this spiritual lens, if you will, to politics. So it's both the spiritual lens and also the logic lens, right. So it's left brain, right brain, and it's looking at what I wrote it leading up to the election, so I didn't know which way the election was going to go at that time. Wrote it leading up to the election, so I didn't know which way the election was going to go at that time. Um, but it essentially explains the moment that we're in and explains what happened during the election. So neat it no matter which side you're on.

Speaker 2:

It's like if you're, if you're a democrat supporter, kamala supporter, whatever, it will explain why your crazy uncle loves trump, right, yeah, trump supporter. It'll explain you know why, why people hate you. I think people kind of know that if they're trump supporters, they kind of have a sense of but. But it'll give a a. It's like a 30-year plan for how do we change things? And the vision is is like much smaller, much more efficient government, essentially like and and but. What politics is downstream from culture, so what cultural shifts need to happen in order to make that a reality. So right now, trump won and I'm super excited about that. I I love what the what you know, elon and vivek are up to on rfk and get like, I mean, looking at it from outside, it's crazy what's been happening for so many years, but essentially so, one of the realizations I I was always and I think this is the experience of a lot of people I was always democrats in my mind, you know, like I was a tech bro, like that's what tech bros do.

Speaker 1:

They're Democrats.

Speaker 2:

Lived in New York city, all the things Right, and then, as Trump got elected, I recognized that, that that Like he broke he broke late night comedy. Late night comedy stopped being funny and they contorted themselves into all these pretzels in order to make him look stupid when he said something that was actually quite reasonable and I was like that was kind of my wake up call to like wait, what the hell is going on. And that went to this deep dive, just like now I'm on book six with Family Constellations. I probably read over 100 books about politics and started to get really, really deep on that and understand what actually works. And you know many of the.

Speaker 2:

I was like I loved Bernie back in 2016. And then, like after I started deep diving, I started to listen to what he actually said and his policies and ideas and think them through. I'm like, no wait, that's not going to work. But I guess the words are only 7% of communications. We get excited about the tone and all the hoopla around it without actually thinking about what's actually being said.

Speaker 2:

But the bottom line is that I mean it's a whole book, but the bottom line is that I think the vast majority of people, if you look at a high enough level. We want the same things. We want for people to be happy, healthy, prosperous and safe. We want a thriving economy and we want a sustainable, healthy planet. I think we can all agree on those outcomes. Now the question is how do we get there? What are the strategies?

Speaker 2:

And so, when you look at, when you break it down like happy, well, that's really an inside job. It's not something the government can do. The government can get out of the way of making you stop making you miserable, but it can't make you happy, you know, or I mean, you can't make you miserable either, but but it can stop doing stupid shit, but happiness is an inside job. Health is mostly an inside job. There's environmental factors.

Speaker 2:

There's like rfk is famously talking about the fluoride that they put in the water here, things like that. But, um, and there's definitely a lot of systemic factors, right, like feeding people crap that makes them sick and all that stuff. Um, at the end of the day, though, health is has to be is a personal responsibility to we can, again, we can stop poisoning people, but at the end of the day, health is going to be personal. And then prosperity Also same thing, right, we can stop doing things that impoverish people, like stealing their money and sending, blowing them up in the Middle East and what else the government has been doing, or you know other things that the government has been doing.

Speaker 1:

Let's just leave it at that for now.

Speaker 2:

But you don't make someone prosperous by giving a poor person money, because the reason that the poor person is poor is generally mindset, you know. So just giving someone who has a poverty mindset more money is not going to make that person more rich. It's going to make them, you know, poor now with a big flat screen tv or something whatever. It is right so. So I'm all for helping people not be poor, but what are actually effective ways to enable prosperity and safety? There's borders, there's police, there's fire departments, that kind of stuff. Again, there's a big piece, that's emotional safety, which is an inside job. Thriving economy is essentially like let people set guardrails, do uh, keep their money and invest them how they want to invest them. And sustainable planet is about just being logic and rational about what are the things we can't do and can't do and what. What's a good investment of resources into fixing whatever issues there are. But looking at it, you know clearly, without like this uh, doomsday, blah, blah, that's, that's been going on.

Speaker 1:

Yeah yeah, that's um, you know, I, I, you know it. All kind of all leads it kind of in my, in my world is like all roads lead to rome, but you know, all roads lead to unresolved trauma.

Speaker 1:

You know, it's kind of my, I'm a one trick pony in some. In some way it's like, yeah, it's like health unresolved trauma, finance unresolved trauma. You know like, and you start seeing how and and I'm very curious, like how, like, could we as a country, like name, dealing with unresolved trauma as a national priority? Right, it's yeah, you know how we did with smoking or how we did with, like, taking lead out of gasoline or whatever that looks like you know like how do you get that voice?

Speaker 1:

and that's partly my mission is to say, okay, there's things that happen. Okay, let's say let's say republicans are right. Let's say democrats are right. Let's say they're right about portions of it. Let's say they're right about the victim perpetrator narrative Sure, okay, you're right.

Speaker 1:

Everybody's a racist, everybody's, you know, sexist, everybody. Okay, sure, okay, yeah, okay, yes, yes, yes, all those things, what are we going to do about it? Deal with their own shit and it's like that's, that's such a. You know it's. It's the most, it's the simplest thing, but also the most hard. The hardest thing to do in the world is to be like. Personal responsibility does have a massive factor in this, but let's create the narrative and the social structure where we're encouraging everybody to work on their stuff, to work on their own.

Speaker 1:

Result trauma, because we want more winners and we want the Democrats to be the crazy creative you know types and we want the conservatives to be the guys that make sure that the trains run on time and the. The tension between those two things are it's like where the prosperity of this incredible country comes from. Yes, you know, yeah, like it's. It's just such a. I'm so glad that you're, that you're looking at this from this perspective. So if you had, let's say, a magical, I just want to jump on that because you're exactly right about everything you just said.

Speaker 2:

And it blows my mind how we live in these narrow paradigms of, for example, health care quote unquote has nothing to do with health or care, but the health care industry and and and how it's like um insists on this whole 3d causality, you know, framework paradigm, and then yet in every single clinical study we're proving mind over matter in the form of the placebo effect, and like, nobody is even talking about that. Like every single doctor, every single you know medical, knows that this is a thing and nobody's taking it seriously. So I, that's the next frontier that I would love to be part of. Like right now, elon rfk, trump all these like in there cleaning up the mess from a mostly 3D paradigm, I'm all for it. Now, next wave, let's bring the spiritual into actual government, scientifically.

Speaker 1:

If not, we're just going to repeat it. It's like, ok, ok, so what's next after, after Trump? Like, what's the next? We're just going to repeat the victim perpetrator narrative. If we're continued to be entangled in that victim perpetrator narrative, right, it's like you're the victim, you're the perpetrator. We're going to do this stuff. I want to be right above all else.

Speaker 2:

You know, it's like and, and there's much of what we want government to do is in response to our traumas, right, like the whole pride thing is, like I feel unworthy because I'm gay or whatever it is, and so now I need the government and everybody else to reflect to me that I'm like no, this is not how this works. It's never going to fill up that void, because that void is yours, you know, or it might not be yours because it might be, but it's your job to fill that up.

Speaker 2:

It's not all our job, you know, like Byron Katie says there's my business, there's your business, there's God's business.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, exactly, and so you know that's what I'm.

Speaker 1:

So I'm encouraged about how trauma starting to have this conversation to be like you know I have this saying that's like what happened to you is not your fault but it's your responsibility to fix it because nobody else can, can you know it's like, and you can't ask the government to do this stuff. But you can say let's have the national conversation about this stuff to say these are patterns, let's start getting into the pattern breaking business to create more connection, more, you know, depth to our, to our existence, so we can have more winners. In general, I want you know, people from the left, people from the right, people from the up, people from the down, the polka dots versus the stripes. I want everybody to be as prosperous as possible because there's. We live in an abundant world, we live in a world of possibilities that if you assume personal responsibility, you assume the responsibility that you are the arbiter of your. You know that agency, that you're not absolving your responsibility to the collective, that we can. We can create an incredible, incredible future.

Speaker 2:

Exactly, the golden age is within reach. It really is and it's. It's for me that the the phrasing that I use is unlocking or unleashing the human creative life force. There's that energy that runs through us that you know originates from our crotch, which is literally where where life is created Right, and it, it fuels everything. But then all the unresolved trauma becomes these like logs of bullshit, that that diminishes that flame. So peel those layers away that let that flame shine brightly.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that that's. And and to understand the force of loyalties, like there's a book in the consolation world that called it, even if it costs me my life, that loyalty is such a strong force that we will sacrifice our own lives in order to fulfill that loyalty in the family system.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, wow, and people don't understand that Right.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, like, and, and some of these incredible innocent.

Speaker 2:

it's so innocent doing it too, yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and we like think of it as a like, we're fulfilled, we're being loyalty, we're being loyal to our unconscious family system.

Speaker 1:

Right, the stuff that we don't know it it's fueled millions of deaths, right, that, like, when you start understanding that, when this happens in cultural systems, it's like, oh, you know the, the genocide and that happened during, you know the, the holocaust is fueled by the, the humiliation of the world war one. Right, the catalyst of this you know um, you know, perpetrator movement comes from humiliation and the victimization, right, so so he's like, oh, this is a really dangerous force. It can, it can destabilize everything and that's what I'm afraid of, kind of the current politics. Now, it's like, not not afraid, because we're having a conversation about trauma and we can amplify that voice. But you know people that are like I'm owed my pound of flesh through this righteousness, that have absolved their agency to the collective will justify anything to be right, including genocide. It's like, ah, this is really dangerous. You start seeing identitarianism on both sides that, like the of of a perpetrator has infiltrated both of these sides.

Speaker 2:

That's the thing that concerns me the most yeah, um, but you're right, like the, the, these things murder millions of people and include, you know, adding to that, suicide and drug deaths and all of that stuff too, right, um, yeah, yeah, it's costing a lot of lives.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, no, absolutely. I mean it's, it's, I'm, I'm very, I'm very optimistic because I see, you know, it's like over the years, we just keep having this conversation and things get gradually better and better and better and better and it's like, not this exponential thing, but just like over many iterations, the system cleans up the trauma. I think it's kind of like this feature of our systems that it cleans up the trauma, maybe through religion, kung Fu, meditation, whatever the thing that you do is right, you know, whatever the thing is, but it gradually starts like taking away that those trauma entanglements and, I think, family constellations is just this way of like supercharging that, that possibility yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

It's so beautiful because it's so simple and so clean and so effective.

Speaker 2:

It's elegant yeah it's so elegant and it's so, so honest, like the, the honor I I had, a I had for many years. I was like, ah, mom and dad didn't see me or love me the right way, like all that stuff, and it took me like into my 40s, uh, early 40s, until I I finally kind of healed that, um, and it was a dramatic shift for me and it completely changed my relationship, especially with my dad, um. But this is just taking it to a whole nother level where I'm like really shedding any resistance to receiving their love and any need to make myself better than them in any way. You know, just I'm the little one, they're the big ones. They gave me life, honor and respect, everyone that went before me. So it's it's it like for me. The word that comes to mind is reverence yeah, fill me with reverence.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, what, so what?

Speaker 2:

are the like, the, the I was looking at. You know, I know my parents. I know my grandparents to somebody's I don't know my. My mom, my mom's father, died when I was ones. I didn't, didn't meet him, but their parents I don't really know. I don't know their names.

Speaker 1:

I don't know their faces.

Speaker 2:

And it's so humbling, too, to realize that my kids are going to know who I am. Obviously their kids are probably going to know who I am, but their kids might have no fucking clue. It's a whole life. It's humbling.

Speaker 1:

Yeah yeah, humbling, yeah yeah. So what, um, what? What commonalities have you found amongst the six books that you've, that you've done this deep dive into, into family constellations? What's, what are the common uh patterns that you've recognized amongst all of them?

Speaker 2:

I mean in terms of it's, in terms of it's pattern recognition, you know. So they're like noticing the patterns and where how that shows up. I think that the thing that's been so powerful for me is those simple sentences that you say like I'm sorry, things didn't work out between us, because I loved you very much.

Speaker 1:

And the care that it takes to have to say that, to say that thing, and what energy you have to be in to be able to really connect and resonate with it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's powerful. So what do you see in the future of this work, now that you've done? You were introduced with this on Tony's side what do you see this? Where do you think this is going?

Speaker 2:

For me personally or in general. This is going for me personally or in general no for you, are you personally?

Speaker 2:

I think it'll. I mean, it's something that I'm deep diving into for my own growth right now, um, and sharing about with my clients and and whatnot. Because you know, obviously, like I coach entrepreneurs most, you know mostly, and you know, like I've experienced, right, you've like, every business problem is really a personal or spiritual problem that shows up in business. And so if you have this kind of entanglement with someone that's going to really cause issues in your business or likely to, so when that comes up I'll send. I send people that way. I just did that this week send one of my clients to get get some family consolation work, because I think there's really something there. I think I might do some training to become a facilitator myself. I don't, like I see myself as more that type of guide, as a coach, that guide that's done, all the things and then I can send you to different specialists, but I can see kind of the big picture, uh, so I don't see myself being you know doing. I have run a software company. I want to start other companies like I'm, I'm, I'm more of a multi, multi-entrepreneur myself, um, but it's, it's, it becomes, you know, a really core tool in my tool belt.

Speaker 2:

Essentially, you know, byron Katie is someone who's been really instrumental for me as well. I don't know if I'm I'm you're not familiar with, no, no, no, she's incredible. So she a bunch of books, but her thing is is um questioning your thoughts. She has four questions and a turnaround, but essentially, every, every stress in your life is caused by you believing a false thought. So common one is I was working with a client yesterday like, and she was like I, I, I should have more clients by now. I'm like, okay, I should have more clients by now. Is that true? Well, I feel like I should have more clients. Okay, can you absolutely know it's true? I guess I can't know. I mean, I don't have more clients, so I guess not.

Speaker 2:

Okay, great, how do you feel when you think that? When you believe the thought that I should have more clients than I do, oh, I feel like yeah. Then, when you believe the thought that I should have more clients than I do, oh, I feel like, how do you feel in your body? How do you treat the clients that you do have? How do you treat your spouse? How do you treat yourself? Like, okay, what if you couldn't think the thought that I should have more clients than I do, oh, I'd feel good, I'd feel happy, I'd feel free, I'd feel calm, relaxed, maybe energized, whatever. Okay, great. So now there's this thought that you know is not true, and when you believe it, you feel stress. And when you don't, if you couldn't think and you would feel good, can you think of a good reason to hold on to that thought? No, yeah, right.

Speaker 1:

Loyalty time, my own resolve. Trauma for my family system.

Speaker 2:

It's the opposite. I shouldn't have any more clients than I have. You know, I have the exact right number of clients that I should have in this right moment, and so should is a is a great as a big one, but it's essentially like it's such a simple approach to spirituality in the terms of like just removing one by one all of those thoughts that we tell ourselves, that take us out of being in reality in the present moment, which is Byron Katie calls God. Reality is God, god is reality, and when you fight reality, when you fight God, you lose, but only every time.

Speaker 1:

Ain't that the truth, yeah?

Speaker 2:

Ain't that the truth?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I think that's a, that's a perfect, um, I think that's a perfect way to to wrap this up. You know, every time we fight God, we lose.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and family constellations does that so beautifully. Because those sentences that you say are exactly speaking the truth plainly. No judgment Right there may be, like it's a pity things didn't work out, Like it's, like there's no story there. It's just speaking the truth so clearly and powerfully. So reality, God and reality are synonyms, and there's a lot more words we could add to that list. Truth, love are two of my favorite ones.

Speaker 1:

And I really believe that.

Speaker 2:

I really believe that truth and God are the same thing. So when we speak a truth like that, as we do in family constellations, we're we're speaking, we're touching god yeah, that that happens in, in, in constellations on a regular basis.

Speaker 1:

I facilitate constellations and it's like it's you're in the presence of the divine. This is like. The truth is so profound it's almost impossible to explain it. It's like you're you're in the presence of something divine. It's, it's. It's so beautiful, so elegant, so profound. You're just like it's it's it's.

Speaker 2:

It's impossible to explain and it's humbling, you know.

Speaker 1:

Yes, yeah.

Speaker 2:

So, calvin, how do people get in contact with you? Where do people buy your book? I'd love to have this conversation again, man down, in the future. I'd love to have you back. I think we're resonant people, so I want to amplify your voice as much as possible. So, how book go to Amazon. It's on Amazon Kindle and paperback. Um, and we can do with this. Calvin Corelli my personal website is my name, calvin Corelli, c O R R, two R's, one L C O R R E L I, and then for the software, it's simplerocom.

Speaker 1:

All right, Awesome, man. Hopefully we'll have another conversation soon. Man, I'd love to see you know how this settles in your life and how you use this as an incredible tool, and I'm really excited to see what the future holds for you.

Speaker 2:

Thank you, man. I am too. And, by the way, to engage with me. X and Instagram are the two platforms that I'm on.

Speaker 1:

I'm just my name so thanks. Kelvin, I appreciate it, man.

Speaker 2:

Thank you, man, it was a pleasure to be with you.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, thanks for tuning in to the Zulu One podcast. If you found value in today's podcast, please don't forget to like, share and subscribe. Your support means everything to us and thank you for being part of this journey.

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John Acosta

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